today is the day

As my boss put it, today is the day. I'm officially jobless now. When I singed the paper, I didn't feel too bad. It was a bit shocking a week ago when the CEO announced the bad news. The company actually is not doing bad with the current financial crisis word-wide. They are doing this just to be prepared. Since it's hard to convince any venture capitalists for money, the company needs to have some cash at hand. With the Swedish law, last-in-first-out, it's hard for me to escape this time. Yeah, that's the story, kind of boring. But it's life, and it's a Swedish one...

Life is a mirror

Life is a mirror. If you look closely, you can see not only yourself, but also things around you. Everything is clear and objective.

I've stopped my English reading and verbal training for over a year, then I find myself short of vocabulary expressing myself or hard to articulate in both written and verbal languages. I've abandoned my knitting plan almost two months, then I find the time when I need some knitwears for the early winter, I have nothing prepared. I've taken less seriously on my houseplants for half a year, then I find they either propagate arbitrarily or wither away, but either way they don't look nice. I've unintentionally ignored my friends for a couple of months, then I find when the time I contact them, there is not too much we can talk about. I've turned down some friends for a few times, then I find the next time when I invite them for something, they can all find excuses. I can't doubt their excuses, although some of them are pretty lame. I know there is already a gap.

Maybe I should use the mirror to look around more often, just like how I use it to examine my face everyday.

Mood swing

Have you ever experienced such feeling that one day, you want to be completely shut down from the outside world? Nothing really went wrong, just want to being alone, not even being around with life partner or closest friend, who you usually share everything with.

I think today, I am having one of such days. I'm supposed to go to a friend's party. It's not just a friend. The host is my 'brother', whom I feel kind and close with. I don't know why. Suddenly, I just don't feel like going. Not to mention he started preparing this party from 9:30 on a Saturday morning, oh, I feel a bit guilty not going. Fortunately it's just a friends-catching-up party. Other friends will eat my brother's food, and nobody will hurt if I'm not there.

Life has been pretty occupied since our summer vacation in China. Unlike my regular home-visiting vacation, my brother went back with us this time. Since it was the first time he flies out of Europe, I knew before the vacation that there would be some troubles for him. But I didn't know it could be so annoying and tiring. First thing is the weather and his big body. Although it was already September during our visit, with my brother's more than twice of my size body, he sweated like he is constantly in shower. Second thing is the food. He doesn't eat any hot food, which we love and long to some real stuff for a year. Then it's our different interests. Our main focus was food and shopping, while he was only interested in architecture. Since he doesn't speak the language, and English is not quite useful there, he insisted our company to those "absolutely amazing" stadiums, temples, skyscrapers, etc., which are absolutely boring for us. Anyhow, he is my brother, since I invited him to my home in China, I should take care of him. I'm just glad it's over now.

The home-visiting vacation turned out to be not so relaxing. So the first week back to work was more like a real vacation. Then things started to roll over. I wasn't thinking too much, just being pushed by life. At work, the project starts getting more and more serious, most of the time, I have to skip my Swedish classes to finish my task. After work, except my knitting project, I have to do some serious learning of my Swedish to pass two exams in November.

I think I'm just tired today. I need a break from myself.

Current project - VOYAGER LACE STOLE

I fell in love with this pattern when I first saw it on VOGUEknitting at the beginning of the summer. At that time, if I bought the yarns in Stockholm, the cost of total yarns to make this stole would go up to 400kr. Yeah, that would be way expensive for an unnecessary accessory for myself. Then I put the idea behind, and hoped I could find something similar with decent price in China later in September. Surprisingly, who knows I found very nice yarns (from DALE) at equally nice price (20NOK/hank) in a place with probably the highest living standard in the world - Stranda in Norway.
Just in case you don't know, a knitwear from DALE costs more than 2000 Norweigian kronor! Now you should understand how happy I am with the deal.

Unfortunately, the progress of this project is not impressive at all. With the problem of my lower back, I coudn't work for more than 1, at most 2 hours; and with the preparation for the coming China trip, I barely found time to knit. Now it looks like this:
Not too bad, ah!? Hope it will become better after blocking. The white string is the "lifeline" as they call it. It's impossible for me not to make mistakes when knitting. I put a lifeline everytime I finish the lace pattern in case there are mistakes I don't know how to correct. So with the lifeline, I can easily re-insert the needle back to the lifeline row, then unravel without worrying lose any stitches. This is a good method when doing a complex pattern. Thank KnittingHelp for the practical tips. I strongly recommend this website for knitters, especially beginners. The best thing about this website is that all the knitting terms and techniques accompanied with videos.

The musical Mamma Mia

Needless to say how famous ABBA is. The first time I listened to their music was probably at the age of five or six. It's pretty amazing how I remembered it. I clearly remember at that time, every weekend, my mother liked to play ABBA's music from a cassette on the sound system that my farther brought from U.S.A. As a matter of fact, all the ABBA's songs were also brought back by my farther from America. Because of that, I've always thought ABBA was an American singing group until I came to Sweden. Compared to Communist songs, their music was ear-opening. Time can never wash away great music. ABBA's music is still good and touching nowadays.

I'm glad the original London cast of the musical Mamma Mia came to Stockholm, so that I can enjoy those classic songs with an entertaining story. How creative the playwright-Catherine Johnson is to come up with a theatrical story embedded with 24 of ABBA's great hits. Of course, Judy Craymer should not be forgotten. She is the one who suggested the idea of making a musical with ABBA's songs. Since the song writers from ABBA were not very much interested at the beginning, Mamma Mia would not exist without Judy's almost 15-year persistence.

Last night was a joyful night with the enjoyable musical Mamma Mia. I just wished mama were there as well. Although she might not understand most of the conversation, the charm of the music and the performance would be enough to amuse her.

Is this scarf suitable for my father?

Pattern: Meandering Rib Scarf from Lion Brand. But you need to register in order to see the pattern.
Yarn: six 50g hanks (each approx 60m) of ICELAND yarn from Marks&Kattens. I bought them at Panduro Hobby with the summer sale price 29kr/hank. The original price was 49kr/hank.

When the yarns were chosen, I meant to make a gift for my father's coming birthday. After I finished this piece, my bf told me it looked good on me, and when I saw my bf wearing it, I think it also looked good on him. So I start to doubt if this one is too stylish for my father? My father is gonna turn 59!

New start

I couldn't remember the old blog url I registered here one year ago. So yes, this is a new one, meaning a new start. I do post some texts to my space on and off. Since MSN is more popular in China, most of my friends on MSN are Chinese. I know it's uncomfortable for my Chinese friends to read my blog in English. This one is hence created for broader audience, and the one on myspace will be remained only for my Chinese friends or friends who can read Chinese. I made this decision today when I was knitting on our balcony.

Everyone has their own story or opinion. It's good to write them down, and the good thing about writing them down on a blog is that people can choose to read or not to read. There are many types of blogs. Some bloggers talk about particular technique or skills, such as programming, cooking, knitting, and etc.; some bloggers talk about their feelings; some bloggers talk about things happened in their lives...... I honestly don't know which type my blog is or would be. Before blogs appearing in our lives, I used to write my own diary. Because I like remembering things. I'd like to remeber the good times I spent with my friends, the crazy and funny things I've done, the feelings I had against someone or something, who made my heart moved where and when, and so forth. I wrote them down as if I could seize and hold them all forever. Even though I forget them some day, at least I have them on paper which I can remind myself. I think this is the same motivation for me to start my blog. So let's do it! :)